Four years ago there was an event that started me on the path to turn my life around. An awakening. It was the Saturday before Mothers Day my sophomore year of high school, May 2011. My sister and I were going to a high school dance. I'm pretty sure it was the freshman frolic and that is why she was able to attend, as an incoming freshman the next school year. I told my sister that I would go to the dance with her, but if the boy I liked wanted to hang out I was ditching the dance and going to hang out with him. Not even to the school yet, one of my girl friends called me and said the two boys wanted to go hang out and I should tag along. My sister was upset, but I went with my friends. After dropping my sister off at the dance, I drove to my friends house to pick her up. She walked out of her house with drink. A drink I knew was mixed with alcohol from the weekend before. I don't remember exactly, but I think it was a mix of Captain Morgan or Sailor Jerry and Jim beam, with Pepsi. All I do remember for sure is that it was two strong alcohols and some Pepsi.
There were four of us there that night, my friend, the boy we always hung out with, the boy I liked, and myself. We went up to Oak City to TV Hill. I remember I asked my friend before we left her house if I should get some gas since I only had a fourth of a tank. She said no and I am so glad I listened. We followed the boys up to Oak City all the while, both of us were sipping on the drink. My friend told me over and over that I had to drive home and I had to stop drinking that, so I did... for a while.
Once in Oak City we parked my car and got in the boys truck to drive up TV Hill. The boys had an idea to climb up the tower on top of the hill and smoke up top. When we got to the top the boys stood staring at the tower for what seemed like for ever, debating if the wind was too strong to climb. My friend was trying to show them where to get up and passed the drink to me to hold. Stunned she gave it to me I sipped away, as much as a dared, until she took it back. Thankfully the boys decided the wind was too strong and didn't climb up the tower. Instead the boy I like and I went to the other side of the hill to sit and look out at all the lights. A while past and I decided I better get going, so I could pick up my sister and be home on time. (My parents had a rule that we are grounded a day for every minute we were later than curfew). As I stood up I could feel the world spinning and I knew then that I had drank too much, but I brushed it off.
We all made it back down the hill to my car and I had the boy I liked back out my car from under the tree, so I wouldn't look stupid if I hit anything. As I got in the drivers seat to head out, my sister was calling me for the third time. I told her I was on my way and would be right there. At the bottom of TV Hill there is a stop sight not even twenty yards from the high way I needed to get home. This is where I heard the words buckle your seat belt, cause if you wreck you will want that on. So I did. At the stop sight where I should have turned right to the high way, I got mixed up and turned left. Driving down the road I began to realize that town was getting farther away from me. Again, I didn't want to look stupid, so I just kept driving on that road in hopes of a road that would take me back to town before reaching Fillmore.
A ways up the road I saw what looked to be car lights and I knew I found a connecting road. I turned onto the gravel road and sped up, because I knew I was going to be late. I grabbed my sisters iPod to change the song that was playing and took my eyes off the road. I looked up and noticed I was about to drive right off the road into the sagebrush. I knew my parents would kill me if I wrecked into sagebrush, so I jerked my steering wheel hard left. Then hard right. The next thing I noticed is that my car was going sideways, facing Fillmore. I wondered if it was snowing, because that is the only time cars go sideways like that. I began to feel the car lift up on my side, hit my head hard on the seat belt holder and went to sleep. This is where everything gets fuzzy.
When I woke up I was looking at the lights of Delta. I felt all around for my phone, but I couldn't find it. I began telling myself to go back to sleep, so I wouldn't have a panic attack and suddenly I heard my phone ringing. It was out in the road. Not realizing I was in a wrecked car laying on its top, I undid my seat belt, felt a thud, and went back to sleep for a second. The next thing I remember, I was standing at my phone and saw that it was my sister calling me. I ended that phone call and immediately called my mom. My phone was at a very low battery percentage, I want to say it was 5%. My mom answered and I stared at my car. I only remember bits and peaces of the phone call, mostly the confusion of not knowing what was going on. My mom likes to tell the story of the phone call. She says I repeated my self every few sentences for half an hour until they found me. The sentences were "Mom I think I wrecked my car, it is in the middle of the road upside down." "Was I with someone tonight? I don't remember." "I think I am by where we Easter camp, I see lots of cedar trees." (there were no cedar trees, just sage brush, but I was by where we camp). "Mom there is a car coming up the road, I can see the lights." mom: well stop them "NO!! What if they rape me or something" mom: Is your car in the road? Are the lights on? "Yeah, mom I don't want them to stop I am scared!" (The lights were the light of the dairy, not a car).
While my mom was on the phone with me, my dad was calling my uncle the cop. He was just leaving Oak City and was headed to find me. My older brother who had been told to stay home with my baby sister, called the boy we always hang out with and asked him where I was and what was going on. My brother knowing what we had been up to that night came looking for me, having a hunch of where I was. The boy I like knew what had happened thanks to my brother, so he too began to drive to see where I was at while the boy we always hang out with and my friend hid in the bushes to hide from cops. My uncle the cop, being the smart cop he is, turned on his lights and siren, so I could tell my mom if he was getting closer. Because of the lights, the boy I like was able to find me first. I was still on the phone with my mom and told her he had found me. She said to give him the phone.
The next part I remember was sitting in a cop truck. My uncle had already asked m to blow on the breathalyzer and this new cop I didn't know had me blow in it two more times. I remember it was so hard and it gave me a headache. By this time I looked out the window and saw my mom, dad, and brother were here. The cop that I didn't know came and sat in the truck with me. He asked if I had been drinking and I said yes as I stared at my car. I looked at him and asked if my air bags went off. He said they hadn't. I looked back at my car and wondered how that could be. The cop got back out of the truck and talked to my uncle. My uncle then went over to my parents and told them, well sis, good news is she blew a zero, bad news is she admitted to smoking pot. In that moment I think I was just as shocked as my mom! I knew the boys I was with smoked pot, but did I? I never did that? Drugs scare me why would I do that?? As these thoughts were pouring through my brain, I heard my uncle tell my mom he was kidding. I watched as my mom punched my uncle.
I sat in that cop truck for a very long time. Then all of a sudden I was home and my mom was examining my wounds. Nothing was major so she let me go to bed, but I had to sleep on the couch. During the night my mom came in and woke me up. I was super mad, cause I wanted to sleep. She asked my what day it was. I replied well yesterday was Sunday so today must be Monday (wrong). Then she asked me what had happened tonight. Still irritated she wouldn't leave me alone, I replied I wrecked my car, okay. She let me sleep after that.
The next day was Mother's Day. My family missed church to go get my car that was now on the side of the road. My uncle, dad, and brother tipped it right side up and pushed it off the road the night before. I thought it would be harder to see my wrecked car in the day light, but it wasn't. It seemed to have more harm on my sister than me. My mom showed my the tire marks from where I swerved on the road, and then the spots my car had hit when it was flipping. (it flipped four times).
I had a concussion and a swollen bruised head from the wreck (my mom says I looked like a downs syndrome girl, I had no nose), so I sat at my moms office rather than going to school for a few days. In those few days, my dad didn't talk to me, or look at me. Finally he did. He said my punishment was choosing my own punishment. I chose to be grounded for forty days (that's another story). School was almost out and I was working for a local horse trainer. As it turns out being grounded for half the summer and working every day all day was the best thing that could ever have happened after the wreck.
Because I was grounded, I didn't get to get hang out with my friends and be around the drinking, which even though I promised myself never to drink again, I know I would have broke that promise had I been with them. And the best part about working all day every day is I had a new best friend. A friend who also worked for the horse trainer. She told me to come over and learn how to goat tie one morning and our friendship has been ever since. This friend was and is the most happy, giggly, spiritual person I know. That grew on me. Some say that she and I are the same person. I can't think of any better compliment. She helped me to change and continue on the path to eternal happiness.
Sometimes what seems like the scariest thing is the best thing for us. Today I think I have a driving phobia. It takes me a while to be comfortable driving and I don't like driving at night or in places I don't know. But I would never change what happened. I see so many tender mercies in this story. The fact that my phone didn't die while I was on the phone with my mom for so long. My uncle the cop being in Oak City when my dad called. Me knowing where I was when I had no idea where I was. Hearing the words put on your seat belt. My car didn't cave in on my it held up after flipping four times. Being grounded and becoming best friends with the best girl I ever could have. There are a lot of scary parts to this story and I don't always like thinking about it. But over all I see God has a plan for me, this was part of that plan. Through this I realized, if God allowed me to live through this when someone in Ely died in almost the exact same wreck a week later than mine. I need to shape up and be the person God needs me to be. I owe him that much. This didn't completely turn me around, I still had hang ups and bumps here and there. But it got me started, and no one changes over night. It is a process.
